Autumn’s Time
A Hidden Story
By: Birdie Jay
Autumn flipped the invitation over, fingers tracing the words as she slowly read it out loud. Her heart couldn’t help but drop every time she read Erdu’s name. She wanted nothing more than to reject the invitation, but the thought of him made her hesitate. Shaking her head, she crumpled the invitation and looked out the window, imagining the whispers she would get if she went. She wasn’t sure she could take it if the rumors started again, and she was tired of people talking about her. Autumn closed her eyes as a memory of her staying in her room for weeks took over. She grimaced as the same feelings bubbled up, and she was drowning again. Shaking the memory off, she shoved the crumpled invitation into her purse, leaving the table. Even if it were for Erdu, she couldn’t bear going through it all again.
Walking through the front door, Autumn closed the door behind her, sighing in relief that the house was warm. Removing the scarf wrapped around her neck, she placed her purse and scarf in the closet and walked into the living room. She stopped in surprise to see Will and Rose standing over a few dresses laid out meticulously on the couch, a serious expression on their faces.
“What’s going on?”
Rose looked up distractedly and smiled as her eyes caught Autumn standing there.
“Welcome home”
Autumn walked over and gave both Will and Rose a hug before continuing her questioning.
“What are the dresses for?”
“For the Spring party.”
“I – what? Are you both going?” Autumn asked in confusion.
“Don’t be silly,” Rose waved, “They’re your dresses. You can’t go looking like you don’t have a home.”
Autumn shook her head, “But I’m not going.”
Rose looked up from the dresses and gave Autumn an incredulous look, “And why not?”
“Why not?” Autumn repeated, thinking the question was ridiculous.
Rose lifted a brow, waiting for her response.
“Because I don’t want to,” Autumn sputtered out.
“That’s not a very good reason.”
“Reason enough for me.”
Rose gave Autumn a long look, “You can’t run away forever; you need to start facing it,”
“I’m not running away,” Autumn dismissed.
Rose continued to stare at her.
“I’m not!” she repeated, looking off to the side to see a slight smile on Will’s face.
“Doth does protest too much,” Will said.
“I’m not protesting. I’m simply saying the truth.”
Will lifted his hands and shrugged, looking back at the dresses.
Rose grasped Autumn’s hand, bringing her face to hers so she could look directly into her eyes.
“You’ve been in this house long enough. You have nothing to feel guilty about. I will no longer condone you locking yourself up as if you were guilty. You will go to the Spring ball, and you stand tall for the Equinox family,” Rose said, looking back at the dresses, “Now,” she continued, “which one do you like more?”
Autumn closed her eyes and pointed at any dress, knowing she had no choice.
“Good choice,” Will said.
Autumn glared at Will, causing him to look away. She watched as Rose lifted the dress and nodded her head in approval.
Autumn sighed, folding her arms as Rose raised the dress and held it to her. She knew she couldn’t back out; going was her only option now. She was not looking forward to this party at all.
Autumn stood at the entrance of the Spring estate, Will at her side, waiting to escort her inside.
“We could always turn around,” Will said.
Autumn glanced at him before looking back at the estate, “Rose would kill me. Besides, she’s right. I can’t keep hiding away forever. He’s my friend and deserves a proper congratulations.”
Will smiled proudly. “Well then, shall we?” he asked, lifting his arm.
Autumn sighed, “Let’s.”
They both climbed up the steps, where she was approved for entry. She gave Will a short goodbye and entered the estate.
Autumn walked into the ballroom and was hit with the sweet smell of vanilla and jasmine. The music swayed softly throughout the room, and she looked around in fascination as the guests became a swirl of reds, yellows, and pinks as they danced. She adjusted the butterfly clip in her hair as she noticed the hats on their heads that looked like blooming flowers.
She briefly wondered if she was underdressed, looking down at her sage green dress, with lace vines making their way up her body to her fingers, where they reached her painted nails of gold. She kept her makeup simple with a mauve lip and a similar blush color.
Taking a breath, she walked further inside, keeping to the walls. It would be best if she caught Erdu, said her greetings, and left before more people appeared.
Glancing around the room, her heart sank as her eyes made contact with Miss Petals. Giving a quick nod and smile, she began walking away and felt her heart sink as Miss Petals waved to Autumn and excused herself from the group, making her way to her.
“Well, if it isn’t, Miss Autumn,” Ms. Petals said, giving her a quick peck on each cheek.
“Hello, Ms. Petals.”
Miss Petal’s ruby lips smiled, a glint reflecting in her cold green eyes. “I’m surprised to see you here, especially with everything that happened to you.”
Autumn forced a smile on her face, “I’m just here to support a friend.”
Miss Petals took a drink from a pale yellow glass.
“Yes. Good news, isn’t it?”
“It is,” she agreed.
“Well, hopefully, you’ll spread only good things. ”
Autumn dug her nails into her palm, and before she could reply, someone stepped beside her.
“If it isn’t the beautiful, Miss Petals.”
Autumn looked to her side and was surprised to see Cyrus there. She hadn’t seen him in a few years, and he looked good in his forest green suit with gold flecks sprinkled throughout.
She covered her disgust as he reached over and kissed the top of Miss Petals’ hand.
Miss Petal’s smile widened and fluttered her pale pink lashes, “You’re a charmer,” she said coyly.
“Only to those that can light a room.”
Miss Petals laughed, and Autumn looked down at her dark green heels to hide her rolling eyes.
“Well, are you going to ask me for a dan-”
“Now-” Cyrus interrupted, “If you’ll excuse me, Miss Petals. I need to take Autumn aside.”
Cyrus lifted his arm for Autumn to loop through, and catching on quickly, she gave Miss Petals a nod, and they both walked away.
“She likes to cause trouble,” Cyrus said.
“You mean get on my nerves,” Autumn mumbled.
Cyrus laughed and walked them to a more secluded area.
“It’s surprising to see you here, though.”
Autumn watched as people danced, her arm still looped through Cyrus’.
“Yes, well. I was invited and wanted to give my well wishes.”
Cyrus looked at Autumn with a curious expression but didn’t ask as a burst of applause resounded through the room.
They both watched as Blossom made her way to the middle of the ballroom, wearing a beautiful pink gown.
Autumn glanced around, frowning slightly when she didn’t see Erdu.
“It’s a tradition in the Spring family for the bride-to-be to come out first to receive the attention and congratulations of the party,” Cryus said in answer to her silent question.
Autumn nodded in understanding and caught steel-colored eyes on her when she turned her head. Suddenly, the room was smaller, and everyone’s eyes were on her. Excusing herself, she walked to a place where no one was around and stepped behind a plant. Hands to her chest, she breathed out slowly to calm herself. Glancing at a seam in the wall, she tilted her head in curiosity and pushed on it gently, covering her mouth in surprise as it swung open. Hesitating, she looked behind her and stepped inside, watching as the door closed.
She stared in fascination as drawn figures of children laughing moved across the wall, chasing down a balloon. Following the drawings, she stopped as the hallway turned into a room with a large window. The moonlight illuminated the room, making the figures appear as if they were glowing softly against the wall.
She stepped back in surprise as she caught a figure lying on the couch, facing the window. Feeling apprehensive, she quietly walked over to look more closely. Her eyes widened in surprise when she saw Erdu lying on the couch with his eyes closed, the light reflecting on the darkness of his skin and making his hair as bright as the moon.
Slowly moving back from the sofa, her eyes caught one of the children running across with the balloon. Gasping as the balloon popped, sparking the room with light and filling her with momentary wonder.
“Autumn?”
Autumn jumped at the sound of her name, smoothing down her dress before looking at Erdu.
“Hello, Erdu.”
“Hello, Autumn,” he started with a smile, “I’m surprised to see you here.”
“You and everyone else.”
Erdu’s smile widened, and he immediately sat up, making space next to him, “Would you care to sit with me?”
Autumn gave a slight nod and sat down, facing the window.
“How long has it been? 3 years?” Erdu asked.
“2,” Autumn corrected. “Aren’t you curious how I found this place?”
Erdu shrugged, “You tend to find things others normally wouldn’t. Besides, it doesn’t really matter.”
Erdu turned his head to look out into the night.
“I’m getting married in 3 weeks, Y’know?”
“Yes. I’m aware.”
“I’m getting married,” he repeated.
Autumn lifted a brow and glanced at Erdu, “Did someone question you?”
Erdu chuckled awkwardly, running his hand over his head.
“No. That was more for me than you.”
“Having doubts?”
“No,” Erdu said with certainty. “It’s just – I’m doubting myself.”
Autumn grew quiet, ignoring the tug in her chest; she faced Erdu and sighed.
“It’s just an engagement party.”
“I know,” Erdu groaned. “I’m starting to believe I’m not good enough.”
Autumn snorted and leaned her head against her palm, a small smile on her face.
“It’s not funny.”
“It is a little funny. Sometimes, I wonder if you know yourself at all.”
“What does that mean?”
“I may have been gone for 2 years, but from what I remember, you would not have chosen her lightly. Besides, the simple fact that you’re questioning your worth says everything.”
Erdu continued to look doubtful, and Autumn sighed.
“Are you sure you love her?”
“Of course I do,” Erdu said.
“Are you planning on calling off the wedding?”
“No! I would never do that. I want to marry her.”
“Then, there’s not much to question, is there? You’ll marry her regardless, so just work on being good enough.”
Erdu grew quiet before looking at her.
“I’ve missed you.”
Autumn smiled, “Likewise.”
They both went silent.
“I should get going,” Autumn said.
“So soon?”
“I’d prefer not to overstay my welcome.”
“But you wouldn’t be.”
“I saw Crystal, and I’d prefer not to run into her,” Autumn said.
Erdu frowned, “She’s not the same person as before.”
“Because spreading rumors about me murdering my parents and suitor makes her a better person.”
Erdu flinched.
Autumn knew that Crystal was Erdu’s sister, and she may have come across harshly, but the thought of her made her want to gnash her teeth and strangle her.
Staring at the palms of her hand, she recalled when all the rumors started. When the police barged into her home, taking her into custody and stopping her from going to her own’s parent’s funeral. It made her afraid. Afraid of the looks, the desperation to prove herself, the rejection after trying. The way people turned on her so quickly left a hurt in her that she didn’t want to admit.
“I’m sorry, Autumn,” Erdu said.
“It’s not your fault. Besides, Crystal is your sister.”
“Yes, well. It still doesn’t make any of it right.” Erdu grabbed Autumn’s hand, making her look up at him. “I can’t change the past. No one can, and I know how awful everything was for you. But I mean it when I say that she’s changed. I don’t believe she understood how big it would get.”
Autumn pulled her hand from his, “It changes nothing.”
“No. It doesn’t, but it’d be amazing if you tried.”
Autumn dug her nails into her palms, and the thought of forgiving Crystal made her want to scream.
“It would be great if you stayed longer. I’ll make sure Crystal won’t speak with you.”
“Fine,” she caved. “But only until you are announced.”
Erdu smiled and pulled Autumn into a hug, “Thank you.”
“Yes. Yes. Don’t you have an engagement party to go to?”
Erdu laughed and stood, “I’ll see you there.”
“See you there.”
Autumn watched as he left, then turned to stare out the window for a while. She was surprised at how easy it was to speak with him. She had expected to be more bitter, but she found herself rooting for his love and being happy for him.
Sighing, she left the room and into the sounds of the party. Squaring her shoulders, she reminded herself that she would only be here for a moment longer. Then she could leave.
Stepping out from behind the decorative tree, she tried to make herself as inconspicuous as possible and made her way to the bar. Only to be stopped by the same gray eyes she had seen earlier.
“Autumn.”
Autumn walked past her, not bothering to respond, and glared when she stopped her from continuing forward.
“Move,” Autumn said through gritted teeth.
Crystal shrank for a moment before speaking.
“I would like to speak with you.”
“That’s not happening. Now, move.”
“I know you hate me for all I’ve done, but would you please take some time to hear me out?”
Autumn drew back, ready to push her out of the way, and noticed Crystal’s downcast eyes and drooped shoulders. Remembering Erdu’s words from earlier, she forced herself to pay attention.
“What do you want?”
Crystal lifted her head, looking away when she caught Autumn’s eyes and tucking her hair behind her ear.
“I’m sorry. For everything I’ve done. I’m so sorry.”
Autumn was surprised to hear the sincerity in her voice and reminded herself that she most likely didn’t mean it.
“You weren’t sorry before.”
“I know. And if I could take it back, I would. I-I was so jealous of you and the life you had. It doesn’t make it right, but I truly didn’t understand what it would lead to, and by the time I realized it, it was already done.”
Autumn said nothing, mind racing as she was met with a different version of Crystal. The arrogant and prideful woman she had once known seemed softer in comparison.
“I tried to tell the truth. I went to the authorities, but no one listened to me. I thought, okay, maybe I could talk with you and tell you how sorry I was, but I could never reach you. It was as if you disappeared.”
Crystal’s arms wrapped around her body, her face full of remorse, and she looked Autumn in the eyes. “If I could change it, I would.”
Autumn felt a rise of anger, and just as quickly as it rose, it disappeared. She wanted to be more upset and hold on to her anger for a bit longer. But, as Crystal stood before her apologizing, she realized that she had stopped needing it.
Autumn had known that Crystal was looking for her, remembering the day she had come over, and she told Rose to send her away. She had gathered what she was there for, but the damage had already been done. She wanted nothing to do with her, and the thought of not being able to be at her parent’s funeral only made her anger worse. But as time would have it, she healed, seeing her parents off in her own way, forcing herself to stay angry to hide her fear of the world.
“Is that all?” Autumn questioned.
“I- Yes,” Crystal said in surprise, staring searchingly at Autumn.
“I appreciate your apology. All is well.”
Crystal’s eyes widened, a passing look of relief crossing her face before confusion.
“All is well?” Crystal repeated. “I truly am sorry.” Crystal continued.
“Yes. I know. You don’t have to repeat it. It’s not right what you did, but I’m not angry anymore.”
“Oh.”
“Right, I’ll be going now.”
Crystal nodded and stepped aside.
“Goodbye, Autumn.”
“Goodbye, Crystal.”
And with that, they both went their separate ways.
Autumn walked up to the bar and blinked in surprise to see Cyrus leaning against the counter with a drink in hand, eyes following her as she stood beside him.
“I’m guessing that’s why you disappeared.”
Autumn snorted into her glass as she thanked the attendant.
“That obvious?”
“Either that or Erdu,” Cyrus said, turning to her.
“Well, surprise. It was both.”
“Sounds like fun.”
“Quite a party.”
Autumn looked down into her glass, staring at the shimmering lavender color swirled around in her cup.
“It was rather eye-opening, honestly,” Autumn said. She had no idea why, but the need to get her thoughts out made her speak.
Cyrus lifted a brow in question, and Autumn enjoyed how the drink started warming her.
“I came here expecting to leave as soon as I congratulated Erdu. The thought of bumping into anyone here was daunting and, quite frankly, terrifying.”
“And then?”
“And then I bumped into the one person I wanted to avoid,” Autumn said, lifting her head, a slow smile forming on her face,” It was the most freeing thing I’ve done in a long time.”
“That much of a party, huh”
Autumn’s smile widened, and Erdu’s eyes glanced down before looking up again.
“I’m not angry anymore.”
“That’s a good thing.”
“Well, I was more scared than angry,” she admitted.
Autumn faced the shouts that erupted in the room, congratulations being shouted as Erdu walked through the crowd.
“I realize now that I placed too much importance on how I was viewed and expected things from strangers who didn’t owe me anything. Somewhere along the line, I forgot the people standing next to me the whole time. I completely forgot that I’m loved.”
Autumn lifted the glass to her lips and quickly downed her drink.
“And now?” Erdu said.
“Now? I’ve made peace, and I’m free,” she laughed. Autumn placed her glass on the counter, “I need to go.”
Cyrus set his glass down and stretched his arm to her.
“I’ll walk you out.”
“No need.”
“I insist.”
Autumn rolled her eyes and looped her arm through his, “Let’s go, then.”
As they both began walking away, her eyes caught Erdu’s, and she waved goodbye and silently congratulated him.
Getting outside, Autumn smiled as she saw Will leaning against the carriage, waiting for her.
“Will!” she called out to him, laughing as he stumbled, looking in her direction.
“Thank you,” she said, facing Cyrus.
“Of course.”
“I’ll see you around, then.”
“I’ll see you around.”
Autumn nodded and hurried down the stairs, pulling Will into a hug.
“I don’t believe that is appropriate. Others may get the wrong idea.”
Autumn shrugged, ” Oh. Who cares? They’ll think whatever they want to think.”
Will smiled and patted her back.
“We should get going,” Will said, opening the carriage door.
Taking a step back, Autumn glanced at the stairs and was surprised to see Cyrus still standing there.
“Don’t repeat the Winter Solstice!” she shouted as she entered the carriage. She smiled as she heard Cyrus laugh just as Will closed the door.
Autumn stared out the window and couldn’t wait to go home.
The End
