Rating: 3.3
Author: Sally Rooney Released Date: April 16, 2019
This is the first time I’ve read a book by Sally Rooney, and it took me some time to get into it. I found myself trying to grasp the emotional aspect of the story. It reminded me of an art movie, where you would film a vase and try to understand the emotions the artist was trying to convey.
The characters were relatable as they struggled to understand themselves and made choices that we’d regret or didn’t understand as we tried to navigate this world as teenagers and young adults. We can see Connell’s development and growth as a character throughout the story, and we have an idea of his future.
Marianne, on the other hand, felt like a backdrop at times. Her character was written as someone who was almost wise beyond her years but still young in many ways. She understood how she was viewed, understood the reason behind her bullies, and forgave people because of her understanding of them. She was insecure but secure and held no grudges except for the scars she carried with her.
She was a character who stayed behind, thrown into similar situations repeatedly while everyone around her grew and evolved. The story also mentioned this, but it was disappointing not to see actual character growth. Maybe it was a way to depict how some people grow while others stay the same. I’m not sure, but it was hard to watch her struggle and be surrounded by cruel people.
I found myself waiting for her growth, to see her stand up for herself, and for her to understand that she didn’t deserve anything that happened to her. She was like a character that lived outside of her own character, watching as life passed by her. I finally saw some form of Marianne’s growth that was more internal and accelerated near the end, and it wasn’t nearly as satisfying. It felt like Marianne’s issues were just brushed off as if they were some mystical part of her identity. The ongoing trauma was sugarcoated and then forgotten. It’s almost as if creating her as a character who healed and went to therapy didn’t serve the plot of the story and keeping her in a mysterious shroud with unfaced trauma was a much better option.
I was also confused about whether her bedroom habits had a direct correlation with her trauma and why this couldn’t be addressed. Was she always into this? Did she understand whether she enjoyed it because she honestly did or because of her past? In the beginning, it seemed clear to me that her trauma led her to want to be treated a certain way, but at the same time, it was treated as if she really enjoyed it. Would she no longer wish to be treated that way if she unpacked where it stemmed from?
This novel felt more like an artsy book that wanted to create mysticism and beauty in broken characters. Reading this book, you watched as two characters learned from and grew with each other, a constant orbit revolving around a space in time just for them, afraid of who they were but guided by an understanding for each other, a place of comfort and discomfort. Could I ever see myself picking up this book again? Not really, no.
Would I tell someone to never read this book? No. I’d encourage them to try and see how they feel about it. It just wasn’t my cup of tea.
